AskMen Says Men Are Captains Of Industry And Women Are Captains Of The Office Party

Nope, I didn’t write that crap. Ask Men’s Chris Illuminati did in his article peddling the results of a “study” claiming that women in an office setting only work 76% of the time that men do.  The implication being that these results justify the widely quoted National Committee on Pay Equity statistic that women earn 77% of what their male counter parts do. “This is why men are the captains of industry while women are usually the captains of the office party planning committee,” preaches Illuminati. “But fear not, fair maidens, there is hope for you yet. If women just took note of the way men work they would not only become efficient at their jobs, but the entire office would be a happier and friendlier, and it would produce a cleaner environment in which to work.”

(A happier and friendlier what? Apparently the “wiseass” can’t proofread.)

Cleaner, because according to Illuminati, women are supposed to be cleaning it.  It’s part of his female management strategy that includes not seating us side by side, teaching us the importance of multi-tasking and of course enforcing bathroom limits.

Aside from the fact that the number of men and women surveyed is uneven, I’d be curious to know how many of the men surveyed were married?  Did they have children? Sure woman are spending more time on line.  They’re shopping for his shirts, shorts and socks, registering their kids for intramural sports or managing their family’s finances and health care.

Ridiculous to even bother rebutting this misinformed attempt at humor.  What do I expect from a guy whose literary claim to fame is titled Assholeology?  I’m writing this for the women who felt compelled to throw their peers under the bus, citing themselves as the exception to the rule.  Why do some women think that playing like the boys is an accomplishment?

Perhaps Illuminati et al. need to take a look at a 2004 Catalyst survey of Fortune 500 companies which indicated that companies with the highest percentage of women in senior positions had a 35 percent higher return on equity than companies with fewer female executives. A 2007 study by consultants McKinsey and Company found the stock of European companies with the highest percentage of female leaders rose 64 percent over two years, compared with the overall average of 47 percent.

So if the statistics hold any truth, men keep your company busy.  Women keep it smart.  We do less but ultimately earn you more.  In this economy, what do you think counts?